I struggle a lot with the idea of Valentine’s Day. The present idea of it is quite contrary to its bloody origins. St. Valentine was a Christian martyr, who was arrested and beheaded for conducting marriages when they were outlawed by the Roman emperor. Other accounts suggest he helped prisoners escape, still others say he himself was in love and signed a love letter: “From your Valentine.” However you look at him, he has become a symbol of romance for our modern society.

At some point after his death, he was canonized, which means he reached saint status in the eyes of the Catholic Church. To me, being a Catholic and all, it means we invented Valentine’s Day before the commercial industry got ahold of it (we also lay claim to St. Patrick’s Day and Halloween).

Although I fully acknowledge Valentine’s Day as the commercial event it really is doesn’t mean I don’t celebrate it. Any reason for large amounts of chocolate has got to be right, even if Valentine’s origins are shrouded in mystery.

Additionally, for all the Valentines in my life, I like to throw in a little gift with a Costco-sized chocolate treat for each person. The gifts are usually small; big, beautiful beach towels this year for my daughters, a new pillow for my husband; last year socks for one child and a scarf for another. Although small, the gifts are personal; my mom got dirt this year along with a used planter for the oak vine she wants to replant.

I have to admit, because it took years to get my husband into the spirit of giving me something, I also buy myself whatever chocolate treat the rest of my family gets. So even though my husband has settled into giving me a box of Whitman’s samplers every Valentine’s Day, I essentially get double chocolate. It’s okay, though, because I don’t get a little gift. What’s fair is fair after all. Plus, I’m the instigator, shopper of chocolate and preparer of a fun Valentine’s dinner.

My husband has had some difficult lessons over these samplers. For a few years he just gave me the normal yellow box. Then last year, he found a velvet, heart-shaped box. When I opened it, he realized his mistake – he was buying the box, because it had something like six chocolates in it. But it was fine with me, he made an effort and I had my back up chocolates.

This year, he once again gave me a heart-shaped box of Whitman’s samplers. “Has he not learned his lesson?” I thought. But this wasn’t the fancy velvet box, it was a BOX of Whitman’s; a whole pound and a half.

I love Whitman’s and what I love most especially about this brand is the map. A chocolate map so you never bite into a chocolate you’re not expecting. I think he’s in his groove now – not that I won’t stop buying myself whatever chocolate treat I give my family. If nothing else, I have it for leverage after everyone has depleted their supply and I need them to do something for me.

If Valentine’s Day lands on a weekend or during the week when no one is doing anything, my mom usually joins us. Her Valentine for us is often a homemade dinner. She finds the candy aisle overwhelming and by the time she makes her choice, she can’t afford it. So she decided her treat to us would be dinner she brings to our house to enjoy together.

My oldest came home from college this year because it was also a three-day weekend; it was a rare time of togetherness. But really, who cares about togetherness? It’s all about the chocolate.

Gretchen Leigh is a stay-at-home mom who lives in Covington. She is coming down from her chocolate stupor. You can also read more of her writing and her daily blog on her websitelivingwithgleigh.com or on Facebook at “Living with Gleigh.” Her column is available every week atmaplevalleyreporter.com under the Lifestyles section.