Every night I wait as long as possible. I can’t usually make it past five; actually, I usually can’t make it much past dinner and we eat by 3:30-4 p.m. Sometimes I don’t even wait until the dishes are done before I change into my pajamas.
My clothing starts to feel tight by evening and I can hardly wait to put on my loose, comfy pajamas. But donning pajamas brings on a pajama attitude; that feeling that my day is done and the mom brain is closed for the night. I don’t want to hear anyone’s problems, I will probably sign anything put in front of me without reading it, and I may or may not respond to medical emergencies.
Before the pajamas come out, though, I have to remember to review my upcoming evening. When I don’t, I often end up in a conundrum. I get into the relaxed attitude and one of my daughters reminds me she needs to go somewhere. The mom brain kicks back in with a “devil on my shoulder” psychology of reasons they shouldn’t go: “Do you REALLY want to go to youth group?” “It’s okay with me if you don’t want to go.” “Is your homework done? You can’t go to your friend’s house if your homework isn’t done.” “Aren’t you anxious to get to your computer game and see if your friends are on there?” “I bet your friends are just sitting there waiting for you to get on skype. You wouldn’t want to disappoint them. After all, it’s been three whole hours since school was out.”
If the kid still insists on going then I start to figure out if I can just drop them off, while still wearing my pajamas. They are old enough now they usually can be dropped off. But picking up is sometimes a problem with my youngest. We are required to go into the building and get our child from youth group.
By this time, my mom brain is screaming at me to get on with my pajama evening. I’ll send the kid to ask their father if he will pick them up. It’s not that their dad isn’t willing to drop off and pick up, but sometimes he’s not home at the moment of delivery. Then I have to check with him for pick up because he gets up at four in the morning and is sometimes in bed by the time the event is over. I then have to decide if I should change back into clothes for the rest of the evening or drop them off while still in my pajamas and throw some clothes on to pick them up.
The worse scenario is when I change into my pajamas only to discover there is some event going on in which requires social interaction on my part: concert, PTA meeting, parent/teacher conference, school festival, another random meeting. Of course then I must get dressed again, but that doesn’t mean I lose the pajama attitude right away. I have to sit with the mom brain and confess that I messed up and should have checked the calendar before I irresponsibly put my pajamas on. I have to soothe the mom brain with promises of a longer pajama time the next day; like maybe we can start after lunch or maybe we can just not get dressed at all.
I have to admit I do think over the functions and wonder if I could get away with wearing pajamas. It is somewhat in style to wear pajama bottoms out in public, but it seems to be more of a fashion for teens, not responsible mothers and certainly not the complete pajama regalia.
I have a philosophy that people don’t notice as much as we think they do – but pajamas at a PTA meeing? – not sure that one would make it past social judgment. However, maybe if I brought my pillow too, they’d quit inviting me.
Gretchen Leigh is a stay-at-home mom who lives in Covington. She is committed to writing about the humor amidst the chaos of a family. You can read more of her writing and her daily blog on her website livingwithgleigh.com.
