When my neighbor’s son started driving to school, she asked me if I still got up and made my daughters’ breakfast and lunches. I said, “I never got up and made their breakfast or lunch. However, I do get up and see them off.”

“That’s what I’m talking about,” she said. “Now that they’re driving, do you still get up with them.”

Well, yeah, I still get up with my kids even though they are driving. My oldest was always up early enough to eat a hearty breakfast when she was in high school. The year she started college, her schedule was such that she only had afternoon/evening classes, so it was like she wasn’t even living here in the mornings. Now she’s in a four-year college up in Redmond and she’s totally on her own.

My youngest started driving to school at the end of the last school year, which was her sophomore year. They like to drive to school rather than take a bus because it gives them another half hour to sleep. I like them driving to school because it means I don’t have to get up and put clothes on to take them to the bus (I have nightmares about getting stuck in the middle of nowhere with my pajamas and slippers on). Their bus stop was a few miles away because they weren’t/aren’t going to their assigned school.

I still get up with my youngest daughter. And some would even point out that I make breakfast for her. I don’t really; I kind of force her to eat something before she leaves the house. She’s not hungry when she gets up and would prefer not to eat anything, but as her mother, that’s not going to happen if I can help it. So over the years I’ve tried to find simple things she will eat while she’s putting on her makeup.

For awhile breakfast was a piece of bread spread with Nutella hazelnut/chocolate spread. I let this go even if it was essentially a piece of bread with sugar on it, because it was at least something in her stomach. More recently she decided to back off sugar and started eating foods that were a bit healthier. Although, looking on the back of that instant oatmeal, I note that the sugar content is just as high. But still, it’s oats, the bread was a good, high-fiber bread; I just take what I can get or rather get in her.

And if it requires I bring it to her, so be it. I don’t like the thought of her leaving the house without something in her stomach. Sometimes I’ll make some muffins or breakfast cookies during the day and she’ll eat those all week. Banana bread also subs in as breakfast.

So in addition to grabbing her lunch out of the fridge and filling a water bottle for her, I also grab her choice of quick breakfast for the day. She sees the value of having something in her stomach before she goes to school, so she acquiesces to my concern.

I am perhaps in denial about how much I do for my daughter in the mornings. But I have the feeling she wouldn’t eat, would forget her lunch and would be dehydrated if it wasn’t for my loyalty to my morning routine. But if you ask me, I’ll still tell you I get up with my daughter, but I don’t make her lunch or breakfast.

There is also the sense, now that my youngest is a junior in high school and my oldest has essentially moved out, that this, sadly for me, won’t last forever. And that is why I still do it for her. Or should I say, “why I don’t”?